In The Name of HOPE...

Relapse? Remission?
Not much different anyway. After all I couldn’t share anything about it with anyone. It’s been quite a while since I learned not to depend and rely on anybody when come to this matter. Although I wanna talk about it just to release but not a single person willing to listen. No one willing to listen what else to share the feelings. Not anybody’s fault as I understand this is my life and everyone seems to engage with their own life. Why they wanna burden themselves with other people’s problem. Let alone wanna support the dying me? I doubt it. 
I’m looking forward (very much indeed) for this weekend. It just a short break but it means very much for me at this condition and stage. I just can’t explain the joyous and in some way it heals me. I don’t wanna expect much or ask much but this seems enough for me. Be there. That’s it. Anyway, I don’t know if the people around me can understand that. Let it be. I just wanna be there & enjoy every single moment. Yeah…I have my own so called revitalization but to me this is something different. Be in contribution and support people in any way I can, even they don’t need my contribution at all. I just need a space, a chance & a hope to do something that works for me, internally.